24 June 2011

More than words

"Come to the edge," he said. They said "We are all afraid."
"Come to the edge," he said.
They came.
He pushed them. 
And they flew.

-- Guillaume Apollinaire

I am officially trained, according to the Army...and according to my husband I have assimilated just a little bit too much and he's not a fan of the way the boys here have trained me to talk. I have to admit, I agree with him. But when I speak in words longer than four letters the boys don't seem to understand what I am saying...so apparently there are trade offs...and between now and the next time I see my sweet husband I need to find a bar of soap...the little things.

To tell you that I've lived three lifetimes in the past three weeks is just about the biggest understatement in the world. I can't really describe what I've been up to, but suffice it to say that if I am not ready to head to Afghanistan by now, that's my own fault. ...I've had plenty of training, mentoring, MREs (meals ready to eat), and I can't remember the last time I was allowed to sleep for more than 4 consecutive hours. And for the past few days here we're been living in the field in the middle of the worst rain storm you can imagine...so we're all wiped out.

Compounding the problem is the fact that next week we will all be at war. Actual war. Not simulated Army war with people we have learned to trust. Instead, we'll be spread all over Afghanistan and starting at square one with the people we meet there. Something about that just doesn't feel right. Actually, a lot of somethings about that don't feel right.

I am no longer in training. I leave on Sunday night for an epic journey literally to the other side of the world. The good news is that I am taking 20 guys from here all the way there with me...so at least for the next few days I will be in very good hands. And after that, well, I just have to believe that someone out there is looking out for me. And that every little thing is going to be just fine.